Tag: encouragement

5 Survival Tips for Winter 2020

Posted on by The Style Cake

I’ve done one of these posts a couple of years back and I really think the tips could help get anyone through the perils of winter! This year, winter came out of nowhere, well, not really but it had been pretty mild considering I live in Michigan and then BAM! Snow, wind, cold, cloudy days and looooonnnnngggg nights! I usually have an easy time until the end of January hits and then I’m struggling to get through winter lol.

1. Let’s start with recreation. It can be human nature to simply stay in the bed, stay on the couch and binge watch tv or read, eat and become immobile. In reality, we were meant to discover, explore and venture out. To encourage mental health, getting out of the house is very important! Isolation is not healthy! Not even for introverts! Go grab a coffee at the local coffee spot, visit the library or art gallery or hit a winter festival. Grab a bite to eat at a local inexpensive restaurant nearby your home. Take a cooking class, go to your local hardware store and complete a project for the home. There are a plethora of options to choose of things to do besides sitting in the house the entire season of winter and this is coming from someone who hates winter!

2. Besides just getting out of the house, getting completely away from your environment and going on a weekend vacation is enough to revitalize your mind and body for a couple of months! Maybe visit a quaint town in your state and unplug from social media and technology. Take in the sights and feed your senses without any interference!

3. Body care is so important during this harsh time of the year. It’s easy to slack on skin care in particular because the sun isn’t shining through the cloud but sunscreen is still needed. As is moisture! Continue to drink plenty of water to hydrate the skin. Likely, the winter has plenty of dry moments so water will feed the body moisture from the inside to prevent cracking from dryness. Beyond that, below I’ve linked a few things I love to use for body care during winter months. One is a lip product, body and hair products and facial care products. Check them out below!

A. Chapstick Total Hydration 100% Natural (Eucalyptus Mint)

B. Koils By Nature Nourishing Hair and Body Butter

C. DDF Ultra Lite Oil Free Moisturizing Dew (Spf 15)

D. Vitamin D3 and Vitamin K2

E. Carol’s Daughter Wash Day Delight (Water to Foam Shampoo) [My new ABSOLUTE FAVORITE HAIR PRODUCT AND I WILL DO A DETAILED REVIEW SHORTLY! ;-)]

4. Let’s talk ducking and dodging colds, flu and other healthy efforts. One thing leads to another, right? Well, you NEED hand and body cream in the winter especially because hand washing is still important! How else can you avoid getting sick and stay in good health?! Starts with handwashing first! Since I already gave you a suggestion for dry cracked hands, I wanted to share what I like to keep on hand for immunity and health below!

A. Zarbee’s Naturals Elderberry Immune Support

5. Lastly, reorganize your life! This could include examining your personality, organizing closets and storage spaces, refreshing or learning new skills and/or working on your body and health more in depth. Have a person that you’ve been allowing in your life but they are dragging you down or isn’t supportive? Maybe it’s time to rethink your association. I’ve been doing a lot of rearranging myself, it takes work but it’s worth it! Decide to save money, go back to school, fix your credit or purge things while keeping only what you need! Taking the time to invest in yourself will take up a ton of your time and help you survive a possible tough couple of months in the cold!

Why I Needed a Blogging & Social Media Break…

Posted on by The Style Cake

I swear I never thought I’d get back to the point of being excited about blogging again. Quite frankly, blogging had become more of a chore and pretty much a bore…no “bars” intended lol.

If you’re a blogger of any kind, I think you can probably relate to how ruthless the blogging world can be. Since I hate drama and am content in my own little bubble, putting myself “out there” got me more than I bargained for. I expected more comraderary from fellow bloggers but ya’ll competition is real out here…even if you’re not competing. I won’t spend much more time on that negativity but to say with real things going on in life, I couldn’t fathom letting trivial bits of pettiness and mean girl personas to move me in any way. I had to focus on getting me back to my best self.

In the midst of blogging, I think I neglected myself more than I realized. Truth is, I neglected myself a ton! I spent a lot of time researching info, growing my Instagram and social media influence and that left little time to really take care of me. I’ve talked about some health issues I have before and not putting myself first was having a negative effect on those pre-existing issues. The oxymoron of it all is that all you saw was me writing about what I was wearing, my skin, my self care solutions. Sadly, I let…myself…go.

As if my own self sabatoge wasn’t enough, our family suffered a few losses last year. One loss this year. Yes I said a few and then one. Mentally, everyone who loses a loved one needs time to reflect and gather themselves to be emotionally fit to move forward. That’s just reality. When you have children, you need more time because children need consoling and nurturing. Ours (hubby’s and mine) are at the age where they are “aware” and have questions, legit ones, about the situation surrounding the death. After they are “okay”, us parents need to usher into self care.

I’m currently on that journey of self care. I suffered extreme hair loss, skin flare ups of all kinds including hives, acne and eczema, headaches, joint and muscle pain and more things that I’ll not have to mention because the above is enough. I had to get these things in order and fast! To resolve these issues calls for more than just some sort of salve or serum. Deep research, medical help and just re-acquainting myself with my body again was essential. Now while I am still in process, I am discovering other fruits that need pruning or plucking from my life. Not that they’re necessarily bad but they provide no enrichment or “nutrition” to me as a person or to my life.

Folks…rid yourself of people, habits, so called goals, mindsets, platforms, loves and hates that don’t help you to be a better person. We grow physically but mental health and growth is just as important…actually more important. Social media is social. It’s not essential in order for us to survive. If IG was shut down for good, if YouTube was outlawed, where would that leave you? I had to ask myself if I was too deeply enthralled with something that encourages faux realities. I actually became a part of it. I looked like I took better care of myself that I actually did. That’s the long and short of it. And look, we all neglect ourselves from time to time but I was extreme. I saw problems and put them off making excuses of not having time. Buy out time. (I got that straight from the Bible lol.) It will cost time from something else but its worth it.

Where am I now? Well I am still a blogger and I have some posts that will be coming out but I am pacing myself. I don’t have to post a new look every day or every three days. I’ve decided on once per week. Maybe a lookbook in between. I’m working on my social media plan but it can not overtake my life. Perspective is important and I’ve put things in perspective.

That being said, I am working on some things that I will share a little later. Hopefully, you guys will be as excited as I am about them!

Positive Vibes Only! 

Posted on by The Style Cake

So let’s have some girl talk (guys you’re welcome too, we’re all affected by what I’ll be discussing). 

I was thinking about when I read a Zig Ziglar book back in the day. Zig Ziglar was all about positivity. He promoted it. Negativity sometimes smacks us in the face. We try to dodge it, we refuse to address it but in order to have vision we gotta get it out of our face. Yea, sometimes negativity can blind us from seeing our own potential. The fact that we can’t see our own potential can keep us from even working towards goals. You have to (figuratively) beat it into your own head that you CAN AND WILL! If you don’t believe in you, who will? 

What about when the “peanut gallery is negative? People say that if you don’t have “haters” you’re not doing good. But is it really a good idea to have “haters” and to give that disguised negativity the time of day? We’ll ask yourself what good it does. Negativity is not motivation it’s spewed to stifle progress. Instead of paying the hate any kind, continue to push forward and make you better. It’s hard not to respond to the negative but start responding to the positive instead. Receive compliments and encouragement. Build new partnerships and relationships and enjoy the space you’re in. Remember success is nothing without someone to share it with! So maybe the saying should be if you don’t have love, you’re not poppin! Remember love starts with “self” so if you don’t have self-love….

So this entire post was inspired by a shirt that I recieved from @coolasdetroitstuff on Instagram. You’ll see the tee in the following pics but rally quick let me say, the quality is excellent and and the message is positive! It says “you hate, I slay”. It proclaims not getting involved in negativity even if it’s directed towards the person wearing the tee! I’m wearing a medium and the shirt is pretty true to size. As a blogger, the words are a perfect fit! 

Later Cupcakes! 💋 

Grab your tee here: Wear Positivity 

Smelling the Flowers (Blog Life Update)

Posted on by The Style Cake

Life is always sending us humans through unpredicted twists and turns and this can either make us happy or make us feel a host of negative emotions. I’ve had my own twists and turns lately that have limited the amount of posting that I have been able to offer on here. I thought it would be nice to offer you all that are apart of my blogging family a tiny explanation of what is new and going on.

So, if you haven’t noticed I am now in a new space on the internet (www.thestylecake.com). I have been doing so much to get this site up and running and it has not been easy. It has been almost a year in the making of research and reading so that I could build my website myself without the help of a professional. I’ve been quite frustrated with this site, with false starts and hopes and thinking that I would never be able to get it up. I am very proud of myself because after much trial, error and anguish, I have been able to get my site up and functioning. I still have some tweaking to do but overall, I am very proud of this blog’s new home. This allows me to work better with companies and have freedoms that I did not have before. That being said, lets talk the aspect of blogging…

I have been doing this blogging thing (other platforms included) for over 7 years. I’ve been on Blogspot and Blogger as well as WordPress. I’ve been on WordPress the longest and I absolutely love it! It’s definitely more complex than the other two platforms but it works better for me. 

While blogging, I’ve had the opportunity to “meet” other bloggers online as well as meeting some in my geographic area. While I have met some bloggers that are absolutely encouraging and positive, I have noticed that some are not so friendly. I must admit that it CAN totally be discouraging and disheartening. The reality of it for me is that I have real life going on while for some, their biggest problems are comparing their own “successes” to others. I once read that comparison is the thief of joy and that statement could not be more true! If you spend time worried about what any other blogger (or person for that matter) is doing then you miss the pleasures of blogging and the pleasures of life. I’ve also seen the lack of support from some of the other bloggers. Not just to me, but to other bloggers that I follow. It seems if a blogger seems more successful, some may get envious and refuse to offer the support they once had. Trying to dim the light of others will never make your light shine brighter. It’s nothing wrong with encouraging, uplifting and supporting others. 

This alone made me give a side eye and with real life going on at my house and I needed a minute from looking at the faces of some negative and envious people. I’ve noticed the buying of followers of some bloggers (or the copying of other blogger’s styles and looks) who in turn are angry about the success of those that work hard to move forward in their blogging careers, even accusing others of doing what they themselves have done. Smh. I just don’t have time for this nonsense. Throwing a tantrum because you view others as beneath you (and discounting THEIR hard work) despite their successes won’t change the fact that they work hard! Side note: People are drawn to VALUABLE content. 

I am a mom and wife before I am a blogger so I have lately had some twists and turns that I wasn’t expecting in life. If you guys only knew, smh. My husband (and photographer) has been my wonderful through all of life’s hiccups. I was taught, to never broadcast all of your family’s business as news. It’s never a good idea. So I tend to keep my Instagram and blog site all about business. I’ve set my blog a certain way. It is all about style (fashion) and lifestyle so I want to share with others how to do certain things, style concepts as well as sharing the things that I like and not wild shifts in emotions. Companies are definitely more drawn to practicality over personal feelings (that have nothing to do with fashion and style) if you catch my drift. 

I’ve worked hard to get my blog here, which I hardly view myself as a blogger with a vast audience or “following”. I have my own path and blogging style, I also work every single day. Blogging can’t be done in a casual way and get the results  of someone who works every day. Knowing this, I’ve been busting my rump in hopes of moving my train forward. I’m smelling the flowers sort to speak, going with the flow and accepting this process no matter how “slow”. 

The weather has infringed on my creativity because I’m not in the cooler weather mind frame. I’m ready for spring! I’ll be doing spring looks as soon as it feels spring but transitional looks in the meantime. If there’s something you’d like to see, let me know! I have more exciting news to share in the future, I hope that you all stick around to read it! 

Now back to blogging 💋….